This morning started out awful. I'm not going to lie, it was terrible. Worst morning I've had in a long time, 2:30am roomie brunch aside. Haha. I can be quoted for saying "Anger isn't necessarily a bad thing in the morning. It gets the blood moving." But that's not a good thing all the time. Today started that way.
I won't exactly go into it right now, it's too fresh and still hurts too much. But it involves a phone conversation that I wasn't looking forward to and feelings that I promised myself I would never have to have about a person again. However, like any other day, I put it out of my mind and got ready to go to my second brunch date of the day, haha. :)
That helped considerably. More than considerably, it made a world of difference. I got to hang out with someone who never fails to make me smile from the moment I lay eyes on them to the moment I leave. And um, awesome, Jeff Jimerson was at the table next to us. Duh, amazing. So I had a nice relaxing late morning with a friend who is very special to me and was able to let go of my tension, at least somewhat.
After that, me and the roomie (<3) went to a purse party at my favorite hostess's house and I got a fabulous deal on a gorgeous bag and wallet, plus good girl time, quality roomie time. The day continued to get better because I got to watch the Steeler game with my family, the whole family. My dad, stepmom, Mandy, Brian, Andrew, Jess, Izzy, and Jake. I got everyone. :)
After having such a tough time with a lot of things lately, getting to be with my family for even a few hours is a pretty big deal. Between the misery I've been dealing with in my relationship and the ups and downs and adjustments of moving out, I feel like being with them centers me and makes everything better. My dad and I are developing a much closer relationship, Jess and I are getting along better, and I actually get to spend more time with Andrew and Mandy than I have in a long time.
This picture cracks me up. Andrew, who I love to death and always has the ability to make me laugh, and my Izzyboo, who is the absolute light of my life. No matter how bad of a day I'm having, a hug and a kiss from her has the ability to fix absolutely anything.
And honestly, just the whole atmosphere of everything fills me with a joy that I've never really known before. This is my family, and they love me, and I love them. It feels like me moving out has strengthened my bond with them and made me appreciate them so much more, and I thank God for it every day. I love texting my dad about random stuff I see on Fox News, or just to say hi. I love that Izzy talks about coming over to see me after I get off work. The whole thing is just something that I find so much happiness in, it's hard to even explain.
Tonight, and most nights that we all get together at the house, we all get there and kind of congregate in the kitchen. We're already laughing and bullshitting and drinking and snacking. It's chaos, Izzy and the dogs are running rampant and we're all just having a good time. My dad finishes making whatever food he's making and we fix plates and move to the living room. We eat and talk and laugh and watch whatever it is that we got together for, a Steeler game or the Winter Classic, or just for kicks. We trash-talk the people on TV and laugh our asses off at the antics of Izzy and the dogs. Jake gets passed around (to those of us who will hold him anyway, Andrew refuses until they're at least six months old, haha) and we just have a great time together.
The whole night just fills me with a joy that nothing else can even touch. I've always loved my family and they've always been so important to me, but it's like that bond, that love that I have for them is just multiplying exponentially and sometimes it truly overwhelms me. I'm so lucky to have so many people who love me, so many people who bring me such happiness and love and support. Its truly a balm to my soul to have such an amazing family.
Overall, this day has just continued to approve after a rough morning. And my great friends and family are the people I have to thank for it. I'm borderline tearing up here because I just keep thinking about how lucky I am and how many times I've taken all of these people for granted in my heart. And I'll never do that again. I will never be able to look at my family the same after moving out and dealing with so many difficult times in my life. They are my foundation, my joy, my everything. My absolute. They are there, no matter what, and they always will be.
I need to go to bed, because I have class in the morning. But it's difficult when I can't wipe the smile off of my face and I'm ready to cry at the same time because my heart is just so full right now. I'm rapidly realizing that God will always give you what/who you need in life, or point you in the right direction to find them.
Especially those who leave your life and then come back. That is absolutely amazing, because it isn't often that you're given a second chance.
When I lay down to go to sleep tonight, I will be praying and thanking God for all the great people I have in my life and the happiness and love they give me. I genuinely feel like the luckiest girl in the world right now.
This post made me tear up. Glad to see you so happy.
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